Month: March 2021

Offering pro bono support for dismantling -isms

If you’re reading this, I’m sure by now you’ve heard about the latest tragic American mass shooting in Atlanta. Gun violence mixed with racism, sexism, and classism, with predictably horrific results. You’re probably also aware that anti-Asian violence has recently been on the increase.

The United States—and much of the world—has a serious, entrenched problem with racism, as well as sexism, classism, homophobia, transphobia, and other forms of “othering.” If you’re reading this, or if you follow any of my work, I trust that you wish to do everything you can to help dismantle these –isms, so that we can all live lives of safety and thriving interconnectedness.

Some of the best ways to do this:

1) Read and listen to voices of marginalized people

2) Make financial contributions to organizations working on these issues (especially organizations led by the affected marginalized people) and

3) Speak out and speak up on behalf of marginalized communities, whether through writing or social media posts, or in conversations where you hear people making statements that could harm others.

I do my best to do all of the above, but I also want to use my particular skill set to help. So, at this time I am offering one-hour phone or video sessions on the topic of dismantling –isms. These sessions are free of charge, because I want to make them as accessible as possible. (Although I encourage you to make a donation to an organization working on these issues, if you are able.)

I am hoping that a number of people will take me up on this. Topics you may wish to discuss could include your own experiences of various –isms, whether on the receiving end, or times you felt guilty for doing or saying something, or failing to do or say something, and what you’d like to do differently going forward; co-brainstorming about ways you’d like to contribute your own time, energy, skills, and/or money to work toward dismantling these structures; or any related topics. Perhaps you have an idea for an art project, educational effort, or political campaign to address these issues, and you’d like to talk about it and flesh it out, or get re-energized to work on it?

Whatever you wish to discuss, I will listen supportively, without minimizing, judging, or questioning your experiences. Schedule a session by messaging me at maren@dreamintochange.com.

Committing to 15 minutes a day

When we have a dream to work toward, it can be so exciting! Especially at first! All the good ideas are flooding our brain. We’re talking to friends about it! Maybe we’re posting about it on social media. We might make to-do lists about specific steps we’ll need to follow to manifest the dream.

But… after that initial excitement phase, sometimes we can fall into a rut. The buzz wears off in the chemistry of our brain. Most of our friends already know about our dream. There’s nothing new to post about it. Fears and doubts may begin to creep in. (“Oh, what about this aspect of things? I hadn’t thought of that.” “Is this really realistic?” “Do I really have the time or energy to take on a new project?”)

Day-to-day tasks and other priorities can start to crowd in, too. And before we know it, a month or two after we got lit up with Such An Exciting Idea!!… it can start to fade away.

Does this pattern sound familiar to you?

One strategy I have used effectively to combat this is to dedicate 15 minutes per day to my dream.Actually, to be fair, it’s kinda 30 minutes. But still totally doable. Here is what it looks like:

After my workday at my “day job”, I need to shift mental gears. So, when I get home, I sit down and dedicate 15 minutes to emptying my mind. I turn off the ringer on my phone, and set the timer for 15 minutes. I sit on the couch and mentally review the day so far. I reflect on what has happened during the day, and how I felt about those things at the time—good and bad—and how I handled things. I notice if I am proud of how I responded to a challenging situation, or perhaps acknowledge if I didn’t handle something as well as I would have liked. In either case, I note the event and my emotions and responses, and then let them go. (I sometimes find this to be a helpful gratitude exercise: often I remember cool little things that happened during the day that I would have forgotten if I hadn’t taken this time of reflection.)

By the time the ringer sounds, I feel more grounded, and the second half of my day is ready to begin.

Then, I set the timer for another 15 minutes. This time, I focus on visioning toward my dream. I think back briefly on the day again to see if anything has moved toward the fruition of my dream. (Did I contact someone? Did someone contact me? Did I write something? Did I get a new idea and jot it down?) Then I spend some time just smiling, and enjoying what my dream is. I imagine how it will feel as it unfolds. For example, since my present dream involves bicycling around the United States and Canada, I might imagine how I’ll feel while riding through a beautiful national park or a redwood forest. I allow myself to fully enjoy the feelings of a dream well manifested.

Then, I let my mind gently float toward small, manageable actions I could take to move toward it. Is there someone I could contact? Is there some topic I could research on Google or social media? Is there something I could write? Generally, without much effort, one or two such action steps float easily to me, and I make a mental note of them.

When the timer goes off, if an action step seems easy and quick enough, I might do it right then. If it will take more time or energy than I have at that moment, I’ll instead write it on a to-do list for later.

Fifteen minutes is a magical length of time. It seems small enough that it feels manageable. Yet, in the brain it is enough time for substantive forward motion to happen. I even use the 15-minute “trick” to do various other kinds of tasks in my life. Maybe I’m struggling to do an ongoing chore, or to read a challenging book. I can tell myself, “Hey, just set the timer for 15 minutes, and see how much you can do.” Sometimes I get a lot done in 15 minutes. Sometimes by the time I invest that time, I have built up enough momentum to continue on with the task. But I know I don’t have to, and that is the key.

If you haven’t tried this, I urge you to give it a go. (It doesn’t have to be in the early evening, either; it can be at whatever time of day works for you. You can break up the two 15-minute segments and do them at different times of the day, too, if that works better for you.)

I have spoken with many of you about your dreams. Can you set aside 15 minutes of each day for visioning them into fruition?

To schedule a one-hour session with me to talk about your dreams or projects, use the green “contact” button above!

To be notified of future blog posts, use the green “subscribe” button

And/or, you can support my work financially with a one-time or monthly contribution (thank you to all my patrons and supporters!)